How can i remain faithful all my life?

The question is not whether I can remain faithful all my life when I get married, but rather whether I am determined to stay with the person I marry for life. Every day, we are called to renew the commitment we made in Church on our wedding day; to say ‘yes’ in our everyday acts. I give myself to you and I receive you. To be faithful is to grow together in this mutual gift that began the day we got married and that will flourish more and more through the years. This gift needs time to grow. It is a life project to be pursued together. It is being able to say to the other: Whatever happens I’ll be with you, in good times and in bad. It is a commitment worked at together day by day.

An example of faithfulness is the woman who lost her husband after fifty years of marriage who said: We still had so many things to say to each other! To believe in the other, to hope in him or her, to be open to him or her everyday, is the road to fidelity: a road that is at times difficult, at times demanding, but also a source of great happiness and growth.

However, this state of fidelity is not safe from temptation. Indifference kills fidelity: I don’t have time for you now, my career, my personal growth, my sports, my music....my friends come first. After all I’m free, I want to hold on to my freedom, etc. Little by little, communication fades away and each one lives for himself instead of for and with the other. Then a dissatisfaction arises and when faced with the tribulations of life, we are tempted to break our promise of fidelity.

We need to keep a guard on our heart, our eyes, our body and our language in order to preserve and protect our fidelity just as we would preserve something precious. The temptations of the world are strong: pornography, trivializing the sexual act, seeking my own pleasures, provocative fashion, movies that promote infidelity, etc. So many things can undermine our fidelity. It seems pretty brave to risk a promise of faithfulness, and only God can help us to keep it. The more we are helped by God’s love to stay open to each other, the stronger our fidelity will become.

The Sacrament of Marriage is the never-ending spring which we can draw from every day to nurture our faithfulness to each other. The love that has its source in God can win the gamble of fidelity. Remember the words Jesus addresses to each one of us: Do not be afraid, I am with you always, to the end of time. (Matthew 28:20)